Destruction Derby and Deities

This might have been something I overlooked at the beginning of my stay in Delhi. Whenever I took a bus, I was so excited that I had even figured out the right bus to take that the entire trip was thrilling. I stared out the window, remembered landmarks, and pretty much tuned out the ride itself. But now... now that i've really started to utilize Delhi's bus service, and therefore spend much more of my time on the bus, and the same routes, I am quickly gaining and idea of public transportation life and a deep appreciation for American driving laws.
In the States, we have very concrete rules regarding traffic movement. Lights, turn signals, yielding, "right-of-way"... it's something I gravely underappreciated. Here, horns replace turn signals, yielding is for the smaller vehicles, and there is only one "right" way- the Indian way. They have become such experts at simultaneously slamming the breaks and smashing their horns, that accidents are surprisingly rare! I've seen more bikers crash into each other than traffic fender benders. It's unreal how maneuverable these drivers have become. But as you can imagine, in a huge bus with 50 people smashed in- it can be a little uncomfortable.
Today- I was on my bus going from Hindi class to my volunteer teaching gig... not too crowded, and not at rush hour (which is so extreme and ridiculous, I can't even do it justice with words). But our driver was in a hurry- everyone seems to be in a hurry on these roads. From a dead stand still, he would floor it- heads would snap back and babies went crashing down the aisle. Naturally, there were 2 cars, 3 rickshaws, and a motorcycle about 10 yards in front of us. Mid-acceleration, just after our heads riquocheted off the metal hand rail behind us, the breaks would be completely crushed- this would happen about 4 times in a row before he actually settled down. The people standing up are literally airborne, holding onto the overhead hand rails while their legs swing out from underneath them. It's really ridiculous.
The best part of this too is that most buses have elaborate shrines to all of these colorful Hindu dieties- Shiva, Ganesh, Hanuman- their portraits are pasted all over the front of the bus with big merigold garlands hanging everywhere... sometimes incense- today there was even a stuffed animal monkey hanging upside down. I'm sure it's for the protection of the bus- good fortune- safety- but fuck, where's the Diety of Good Driving? With over 1,000 gods and goddesses, you'd think one would be the patron of road etiquette! But when you have a seat, and you're not slamming into 4 other people and smashing the people in the bench you're standing over, it can be a truly harrowing and entertaining adventure. I was only yelled at by one old lady today- and since I can't understand what she said- I smile, and quickly take her seat when she waddles off.